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I believe so.

Can you promise me that there can be more than this?
This stuff is wretched. Putrid. It can not be what life is made of...but it so obviously is.

I'm not saying life is full of misery, at least not in the way a bag might be full of sand. But I do believe there is an inevitable quality to suffering. You can say that this is the nature of life, of existence. You can say that it's not the pain that defines us but what we do in the face of it. And I might be inclined to agree. But this doesn't change the fact that this life....this misery...is inescapable. And why?

Why MUST we be defined through suffering?

And I can admit that so much good can come of the whole exercise. I can admit that joy lives on the other side of despair's coin. I might even be convinced that the two are not so mutually exclusive as to exist at the expense of the other. That conceit would do more to underscore my point, however.

There are various solutions. They've been posited by various religions and spiritual traditions. Many are vastly different. More are very similar...at least at their core. I'm sure there is an answer amongst one or all of them. I'm sure the answer for each person exists in a different way.
And I'm sure the different answers are all the same.

But it still makes me angry.

It still makes me resentful.

I don't know what sin was committed in the universe that existed before this one to justify this cycle of suffering definitude.
I know it must have been big...and bad.

I know I'm sorry it happened...whether I share I share in that responsibility or not.

But I'm tired.
I'm tired of the walls.
I'm tired of the bars.
I'm tired of fighting with inmates and I'm tired of hating the warden.

I don't want to leave. I'd have no place to go.

I just want to be...

who I was...

before all this.

WHY THE MATRIX MIGHT NOT HAVE SUCKED.

My new appreciation for the Matrix began when i started researching a paper i wrote on paradoxes in buddhist wisdom.

The most commonly discussed paradox is that of causality. To what extent do beings exercise a "free-will" in a world where all action and circumstance are predicated on karmic consequence and conditioning.

Karma-theory in Buddhism is not a simple "what goes around comes around" doctine (ie: the war-monger lives his next life in a land beset by destruction). Karma theory also describes the mental and behavioural conditioning of a being as a function of past thoughts and actions. Engaging in a given thought or action conditions the "mind" to think or act in a similar manner in the future. Therefore, at any moment in time, not only are the phenomenal circumstances of your existence (location, family born into, external happenings unto you) predicates of an inaccessible past, but so too are your THOUGHTS or predispositions regarding those phenomenal circumstances, predicates of an inaccessible past..

So the question is, how does one exercise a free-will choice to be evaluated for future karmic consequence?

The short answer is that deep analysis of buddhist karma theory reveals 3 types of interrelated karmic effects that, though highly coercive, fall just short of being STRICTLY deterministic. There is a "space" left between the sum of all karmic influences on a given moment and the action taken in that moment. The action taken in that "free-space" is the "free-will choice." It is this action that is qualitatively assessed for future karmic consideration. And to the extent that the action serves as a "break" from the previous directional flow of karma, one can be said to be exercising "free-will." Put another way, the highly intricate nature of definition in the universe and the highly interconnectedness of the various karmic influences come very close to predicting all of human action but ultimately does not. and Buddhism doesn't claim that it does.

Buddhist wisdom accepts the failure of the inordinately complex equation to account for all human action. THERE IS A REMAINDER! The free will choice is the factoring back in of that remainder. When the free will choice remains in congruence with previous karmic conditioning then it contributes, in its role as a "remainder-factor", BACK into the complex equation, the cycle of human existence. When the free will choice is a break from karmic conditioning, it becomes an integral factor of a different equation, of a different cycle, nirvanic existence or a world WITHOUT suffering.

This fundamental understanding of buddhism is one of the Wachowskis main sources of influence for the Matrix trilogy. It's what the conversation with the architect was all about. Neo's "choice" before the architect would either 1. perpetuate the existence of the "the matrix", maintain a marginal existence for those outside of the matrix and more generally, perpetuate the war between man and machines OR 2. it would destroy "the matrix", ostensibly elevate the power of those OUTSIDE the matrix and bring the global war betwenn man and machine to some end.

Now the Architect, in order to exert some control over a choice that by definition was out of his control sought to frame the choice within a context that left Neo with "no-choice." His predecessors chose predictably and the cycle continued.

For the buddhist, all beings are faced with Neo's decision every moment of their lives. Someone walks up and punches you. Karma theory allows that 1. this is your just desserts for some previous act 2. your predisposition to hit back is natural but also that 3. the decision NOT TO ATTACK, though incredibly hard to do, breaks the cycle and contributes to the cycle of nirvana.

This also partly explains what some have described as the anticlimactic ending. The final solution to the war was not to be had though your normal Manichaean fight between good and evil; man vs machine, Neo vs Smith. The solution was only to be found through community and letting go.

The men had to LET Neo go away with a warship, compromising their defenses. The Machines had to LET Neo enter their world and fight on their behalf. And in the end Neo had to LET Smith take him to create that union. The solution to the entire struggle was acceptance and communion...or you could say LOVE. Because remember, the world of MAN wasn't the only world that contained love. The programs loved too! ie: little Sati in the LIMBO Ave, Persephone with the Merovingian, etc...

There's so much more of this movie to debate and discuss ie: the alienation of mind, body and spirit, the corruption of spirit, the nature of freedom and enslavement. But this is my take on Buddhism and on the Matrix trilogy. I encourage you all to watch it again in its entireity while keeping some of the concepts I've mentioned in mind.

I really believe this movie was genius.

Smash

FOR THOSE OF YOU...

...who have missed my semi-lyrical musings over the past week and half, fret not.

I am currently undertaking some physiological and psychological restructuring.

I shall return to the land of the living by next week.



Please report back here on Tuesday, April 8th when I will commence the bi-weekly posting that I'm SURE you can all hardly do without.



Cheers!



Smash